In Englisch bekamen wir die Aufgabe, auf folgenden Elternkommentar zu reagieren und dabei u.a. auch zu Satire zu greifen:


As a parent I’m worried about what my daughter is taught at St. Mark’s High School. Why are you teaching her how to use a computer? That’s OK for boys but girls should learn how to cook.
And all pupils should learn latin to discipline their minds and to think logically. Because pupils don’t know the three Rs or latin the country is in such a mess and there’s crime and vandalism everywhere.
What do other parents think?

Das kam bei mir heraus:

My very dearest Mr. Miller,

You’re so damn right about that. You know, if girls are taught how to use computers, they could become too intelligent and you all know what that means. Intelligent girls are bad for our society. Well, on the one hand they could do all the nasty work we men are too lazy for. On the other hand they could steal our jobs! Imagine this: A girl repairing a computer, a girl becoming the president of our, listen, our United States of America. Generations of men made the holy country what it is now. We dominate the world and we’re not going to allow women to take our power. We are the power, we are the holy ones, and we are the United States of America.
You are so damn right, Mr. Miller. Worshipped be you, praised your ideas. America needs men like you or we all will suffer from the crime the womanhood will produce when they arise from the slavery we are proud to put them into.

Just as a side note: How does Latin discipline the minds of pupils? I always thought once you start learning Latin you need to memorize all the conjugations and declinations. I didn’t know that filling containers (in this case also called “brains”) with trash nobody needs in later life is considered disciplining in modern times. Must be, since you are an authority in that area – I mean, in filling containers with trash.